Saturday, April 04, 2009

The Stormers - tolerating mediocrity for far too long

Today's match against the Waratahs might be the worst rugby match I have ever seen.

The Stormers did the equivalent of arriving at work at 09h00, playing minesweeper, taking lunch, going to the sick room for a lie down and leaving at 17h00.

These guys are supposed to be professionals. So treat them that way. Pack some on the plane home. Fire some and never consider them for colours again. Jeez, in business I'd withhold salary for their being absent.

The sad fact is that the Stormers have been in terminal decline for years. And the reason is clear to see. Tolerance of mediocrity.

I groaned when the Stormers had their second loss of the season and Jean de Villiers claimed the performance was pretty good but the result had just not gone their way. He asked the crowd to continue supporting the team. Today he smiled in the post match interview, claimed they were happy with the defensive performance, they could take heart from the defensive strength and that they had improved from last week. And he "joked" that the Waratah's turnovers may not have been legal.

Jean you're a nice guy but you deserved a punch. Fact is you have captained the team to 5 losses from 7 starts. Not once have you showed any regret or that losing any game is just not good enough. And when you're losing, it's best to keep your mouth shut about refs and other teams.

But Jean is just the idiot we have to endure during the post match speeches.

Naqelevuki is the incompetent clown who's laughing all the way to the bank on his expat salary earned for a stroll around the park. Januarie's money is clearly not making it to the bank - the pie shop on the corner must be raking in record profits.

Jake White was right. Schalk Brits might as well be playing for the other side in scrums and line outs. Did someone say, "But what a lovely goose step?" If the backs could actually rely on seeing their fellow backs inside and outside them, perhaps they'd look a bit more confident and make a few yards. Brits and Bekker's athleticism might be wonderful for men of their position's but let's measure our players on their primary responsibilities. I'll give Bekker a break because he's got a sore toe and not on the tour, but Brits should join him on the couch back home. His lineouts and scrumming are diabolical.

Watson is one of our best performers in the loose. And he looks like one of the few players who is playing 80 minutes and exerting himself. But jeez, Luke please try passing the ball when you're in the line.

The Stormers cry foul at the mention of their "light five" tag, but as they pull their heads out their arses - where the Waratah's shoved them - I'd like to hear them to cry contrary.

But let's not exonerate the backs. When last did you see a Stormer chase a kick? When did you see a back run onto the ball, straighten the line and draw his man rather than flip a gentle pass towards the wing along with 15 opposition players. Let's face it, the Stormers look as likely to score a try from phase and set play as Bafana are to win the world cup.

Rassie you're a nice guy too. You claimed the side lacked a little belief in your post match interview. Not good enough mate. You have two Springbok assistant coaches on your team. You have a Springbok-studded side. You talk about poor execution of tactics and positional kicking. Take responsibility. Hold players accountable.

Guys. You're not far off the time the Newlands crowd booed the team and Gert Smal off the park. Frankly you're lucky you're overseas.

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